Friday, May 16, 2014

To Call Nashville Home Again

It's a gorgeous Friday evening. I'm listening to the crickets and birds sing their evening song, inhaling the sweet honeysuckle that has overtaken a portion of my Mom's porch here in Georgia. It's one of those nights that I wish I could bottle up and give back to my heart on a dreary day. Pure southern perfection, honey.

I've started mentally preparing myself for what happens in the next 4 days. Just four days and our world shifts. And I count in my head...one, two, three, four. That's it. I consider the dates too...16th, 17th, 18th, 19th.

It's time.

Nate and I will begin a new season in four days. A new adventure. A chance to 'begin again.' A slow walk of unknowns.

It's time.

We will drive 10 hours northwest and begin life (again) in Nashville. It's been a whirlwind the past couple of years and neither of us knew when/if we'd ever return to Nashville. We love that city and the people there so much, but God had to kick us out of life in the comfortable United States to teach us a few things. Guess we were 'dumb & dumber' in a way - too stubborn to learn some of the things He was trying to teach us while we lived in our insanely busy, rather comfortable way of American living.

It was time for a change.

I could just blubber myself to an ugly mascara cry if I paused long enough to reflect upon all the things the Lord did for us during our time away. Our move to China was indescribably hard for me. When we knew it was time to leave, our move back to the states was indescribably hard for me in other ways.

It was time for a change though - again...

I consider our remaining suitcases. I think I can make the belongings we've lived out of for the past three months fit into the shells that remain. The rest of our items we had shipped from Beijing three months ago and they sit in a warehouse in Nashville. I cannot wait to open them. I think it'll feel like Christmas when I see their contents again.

What does this time in Nashville hold for us?

We have a lovely little rental home waiting on our feet to walk its floors. Hudson has a large back yard to enjoy. I see him in my mind, pacing through it, nose in the air, tail wagging, squirrels running as he chases after them. There's a guest bedroom where I hope friends and loved ones come to stay. There's an office that will undoubtedly see late nights of coffee and chocolate binges; my own four walls for research, class work and writing when I'm not doing the coffee-shop-shuffle.

What will we do with our time? With this new beginning?

I'm not entirely sure. For now,  I'll continue the research, the class work and the writing. Job offers have come and they sit in the air of my mind: I'm not sure what my next step is. Nate will continue being a producer and dreamer, taking risks on those dreams to bring life to people.

We'll sit at our favorite coffee shops, juice joints and brunch spots. I'll walk Radnor Lake with girlfriends, thankful that the deer who stand feet away from us there don't tell on us and judge us for  our raw, vulnerable conversations.

And I can't wait. And yet in this time away, I realize more than ever, how much I needed to wait. That a time of waiting is a gift. That a time of waiting is perhaps exactly what we need. That a time of waiting does not always mean inactivity, but preparation for the next thing.

Four more days.

And we will call Nashville 'home.'